Finally the Big Day Arrives!

Earlier today, I answered a knock on the door and there stood a man with several boxes of books at his feet. My new book! All those years of laboring in front of a computer screen had at last been transformed into print. Nikki vs Jess had been born into the world.

I could hardly wait to see it. I grabbed one box and sliced through the masking tape with a knife. I looked inside and laughed aloud – the cover had turned out exactly as I’d hoped. I loved it. From the two neat stacks of books, I pulled one copy out. Flicking through, I decided that my concern about the font was unfounded. I sighed with relief, and sat down to study my precious book in detail.

I turned the pages slowly from the start, admiring each one. But suddenly I stopped. Where the third chapter should have been, was the title page all over again, then followed by another publishing page, contents, dedication… before beginning the first chapter once more. No. That can’t be right, I thought. Is my brain playing some kind of weird trick on me? I looked again, disbelieving my eyes but also starting to panic. Again I saw that the first eight pages had been printed twice.

I wanted to scream. My moment of triumph had turned into a disaster. My book was shit. I flung it as far away from me as possible. I didn’t want it.

I rang my friend Julie who listened to my tirade, before interrupting with some sensible advice. While I shakily examined, one by one, all the other 199 copies of my book, she stayed with me on the phone.

As it turned out (and I really don’t understand how this could’ve happened), I had somehow picked up the only dud copy of the entire lot of books. I had opened one box out of four, and selected the top book from one of two piles… I ask you, what were the chances of me choosing the single bad copy?

Well, I admit that it’s taken me a couple of hours to recover. But a little while ago, I called my sister to tell her that Nikki vs Jess had arrived, as I knew that she’d been anxiously waiting to hear. I steered my gaze deliberately away from the one misprint to land on the 199 good copies of my book.

“I think it looks great, Deb!” I told her and finally had my moment of happiness, as I shared it with my sister.